Tag Archives: H

Heavy Metal 1/5

Quite tiresome movie which I actually saw in the cinema the first time around, and kind of remembered fondly as a goofy cartoon with decent music, but this time around I found the terrible animation and mostly poor early 70s rock music just a grating experience. The only sections I liked were the story about the taxi driver, and the bomber crew/zombie story. The rest are just boring and embarrassing. It felt like pornography for 12 year olds.

It’s even parody proof, as it’s so ridiculous to start with.

Hold That Ghost 3.5/5

A fun one from Abbott and Costello, and many of the routines in this one were redone a little more slickly in Abbott and Costello meet Frankenstein 7 years later. This also benefits from some Andrews Sisters songs and some good comedy acting from Joan Davis.

Hour of the Wolf 1.5/5

Pretentious flimflam of the highest order. An hour in, the film actually picked up dramatically and looking like it might have something worthwhile to it, but that ground to a halt after 10 minutes and went back to the tiresome, vacuous navel gazing that strangled the first hour for me.

Looked beautiful, but I’ve come to expect better from Bergman.

High Anxiety 3/5

High Anxiety

Not a great comedy, but it has its moments, and part of the fun is spotting the references to Hitchcock movies. Most of them are completely obvious, but there’s some more subtle ones, such as Marnie.

There was one scene that was a genuine comedy great moment though, when the nurse and the evil doctor are being shot, verite, from under a glass table, and they keep putting things on it, forcing the camera to keep moving. That was rather an excellent idea.

Haywire 3.5/5


Rather good action-spy flick, owing more to 24 and Bourne than Bond, but also very, very reminiscent of late 60s and 70s downbeat spy dramas, like The Ipcress File. The music, filming style, and even the clothing evoked this spirit.

This was in essence an arthouse-action movie, with lots of stylistic sizzle, but some really great, painful-looking fight scenes. Gina Carano was pretty good, and while I spent much of the running time confused about what was going on, it resolved nicely by the end, and Mallory Kane made a good, tough lady-spy.

The Haunting 4/5

The Haunting

Lovely, atmospheric, tense, watchable. Not scary, but mesmeric.

It adheres very closely in both story and tone to the Shirley Jackson book it’s based on, even using parts of the beautifully written opening and closing paragraphs of that book in voiceover at the beginning and end.

Beautiful horror.

Hitchcock 2.5/5


Whilst we get great performances from Hopkins, Mirren and Johansen, the story is like a final stage heroin junkie – thin, unfocussed and more than a little frustrating at times. Whole sections seemed to be injected into the main narrative on the slimmest of pretexts, like Hitch interacting with Ed Gein, or scenes like Alma getting cross and going for a swim in the swimming pool – what was that about?

I liked parts well enough, but it really didn’t go anywhere or tell you anything. I did have more fun spotting the homages to Hitchcock movies though. The Birds was an obvious one, but the most interesting to me was Marnie, which is Hitchcock’s underrated movie imo.

The other Hitchock biopic of this year, ‘The Girl’, was considerably tighter and made a point. Watch that one in preference to this.

Hunter Prey 3/5

Hunter Prey

Rather enjoyable, cheap but competently made that mixes elements of the Star Trek episode Arena, Battlefield Earth (and I mean the story, not the rank filmmaking), and Enemy Mine in a blender and comes up with a pretty satisfying product. Very enjoyable.

Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United 1/5

Iron Man and Huk Heroes United

This was rather poor, but I admit I was kind of excited to see a Hulk/Iron Man pairing, so perhaps my expectations were too high. To break it down
– Good: a few (a very few) of the shots and action sequences were quite good. I liked seeing the Hulk wearing a little Iron Man armour.
– Bad: Quite shallow, childish script that really made this not suitable entertainment for anyone over, say, 13, but at the same time it seemed a little strong and full on for younger kids. The CG mostly looked very poor.
– Odd: A section where the guys had to fight off monsters that seemed to have nothing whatever to do with the main story. Yeah, watching the duo fight a pack of wendigos was cool, but made no narrative sense at all.

Hooper 3/5


Easy going, fun, undemanding stuntman comedy with Burt Reynolds, interestingly touching on a man getting to the end of his career, and damaged from it. It has a few laughs and exciting scenes, but my favourite parts are the bar fight and the final jump.

The Heat 3.5/5

The Heat

If you’re fine with a constant stream of profanities, which I am, then this is the movie for you.

I’ve always liked Bullock as a comedienne, and this pairing with McCarthy is pretty fun. It’s not great, but it’s pretty good and chugs along nicely with the odd overindulgent scene. The villains could be a bit stronger (I got some of them mixed up to be honest), but that’s offset with McCarthy’s great BAH-STAN family that cracks me up.

Enjoyable, lightweight profanity-bombing comedy.

Hound of the Baskervilles 1959 3.5/5

Hound of the Baskervilles

Fine Hammer take on Sherlock Holmes from Peter Cushing. Christopher Lee is also present and rather good as Sir Henry Baskerville, and I liked that the Watson in this was rather capable and less of a bumbling audience-substitute who only serves to listen and admire Holmes. This is Hammer of course, so we get the bombastic school and more blood and violence than more conventional versions, but it’s good fun. Cushing was a great Holmes, it’s a shame he didn’t play Holmes again for Hammer.

The Haunted Palace 3.5/5

The Haunted Palace

Rather fine, and I think a little forgotten, Roger Corman movie with Vincent Price. The film looks really crisp and lush, and Corman knew how to stretch the dollars to keep the film looking classy, but kept it cheap by running the smoke machines for every single exterior shot. Price isn’t too hammy here, and gives a fine performance. What is funny is that Corman is trying to sell this as being an Edgar Allen Poe-based movie when it’s clearly an H.P.Lovecraft story. There’s mentions of the elder gods, Yog-Sothoth, and some very fine imagery going on here, with a story of a wizard burned for mating young girls with beasts from the other dimensions, cursing the whole village to horrible mutations, and then resurrected into his own ancestor. Enjoyable shennanegins.

The Hobbit Desolation of Smaug and our Top 5 movies of 2013 – 124

The Desolation of Smaug
Sam and Mark talk about King Kong Vs Godzilla, Arthur Christmas and Elysium, and then get onto their top 5 movies of 2013, followed by The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug

Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone and Favourite Video Game Protagonists Episode 008

In this episode, Mark and Sam take a look at the first Harry Potter movie, choose their top 5 video game protagonists, and discuss what else they watched, played and read this week.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 and Harry Potter versus Star Wars Episode 007

In this show, Max and Sam discuss what they liked and disliked about the latest Harry Potter movie, and then decided which franchise was best: Harry Potter or Star Wars

Episode 002 House of Flying Daggers, Top 5 Graphic Novels

In this episode, Sam and Mark review the arty martial arts movie House of Flying Daggers, pick the top 5 graphic novels, and discuss games such as Fear, Just Cause 2, and some old TV shows, including Married With Children and Red Dwarf